


highlights meet a quick end

by nowimaidan



Series: whumptober 2019 [2]
Category: Daredevil (TV), Deadpool - All Media Types, Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Concussions, Explosions, Guns, Lasers, Near Death Experiences, Team Red, Whumptober, Whumptober 2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-03
Updated: 2019-10-03
Packaged: 2020-11-22 12:11:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20874011
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nowimaidan/pseuds/nowimaidan
Summary: Okay, normal guns? Semi-automatic rifles? Hell, even a tank? He can handle those. If they pierce his suit-slash-body-armor, it's still just a flesh wound. Lazers? They cauterize the wound, and his healing factor has no idea what the fuck to do.--Whumptober day 2: explosions.





	highlights meet a quick end

**Author's Note:**

> hahahahah oh god idek anymore

Team Red (or, as Peter liked to call it, Team Dads ²) figured this Halloween season was going to be the same-old-normal-ish story. (Or maybe that was just Peter. Who knew, at that point?)

Anyway, hoo, boy, howdy.

"What did  _ I _ do?" he shouted over the almost comical  _ pew-pew _ of laser guns.

Okay, normal guns? Semi-automatic rifles? Hell, even a tank? He can handle those. If they pierce his suit-slash-body-armor, it's still just a flesh wound.  _ Lazers? _ They cauterize the wound, and his healing factor has no idea what the fuck to do. Like, do you heal over the burn? Try to fix the gaping hole in your shoulder? Maybe mend some of that charred bone? Who the fuck knows?

At least Deadpool basically regenerated himself once or twice a year, so this wasn't a problem for  _ him. _

"What haven't you done?" the vaguely suicidal, katana-wielding idiot yelled back.

"Fucked your mom!" Peter yelled, cringing as the words left his mouth.

Daredevil glared disapprovingly.

"Sorry!"

For some reason, out of all of them, Deadpool was having the most success dodging the laser blasts. "Dodging" meaning  _ somehow reflecting the laser blasts with his fucking katanas, like, the fuck? _

Peter ducked behind a car mirror as if that would give him any sort of shelter, and… it did? Kind of? The first shot bounced off and hit- Oh,  _ hell _ no. "Duck!"

The Devil simply screeched, "Quack!" before almost getting hit in the face with the stray beam. Almost, thank God.

As the spiderling sighed in relief, the hair stood up on the back of his arms and every instinct he had screamed to  _ run, move, get away, now, now, leave! _

Less than a second after he moved, another shot hit the ground and blew him a solid twenty feet forward and fifteen up. As if delayed, a  _ boom _ echoed around them, and the Devil flinched before dropping like a rock. What might have been a piece of Deadpool flew past, but they weren't exactly worried about him. (It sucked, but he was generally okay after a lot of complaining and a few beers.)

Peter couldn't hear in his right ear when he hit the ground, and the ringing intensified in his left not long before. As he tried to rise, the world spun around him, but he managed to (mostly) stand on his own.

First plan of attack: Grab Daredevil, find at least part of Deadpool, and find out if Dopinder had hung around long enough to give them a ride to one of the whole three places they could possibly get any medical attention.

Peter took two steps before falling over. Great. Fantastic. Just terrific.

"Peter, you seem to be concussed."

Yeah, no shit, Karen.

"Would you like me to call Mr. Stark?"

Uh,  _ no? _ "Hhhhn," he whined instead of actually forming a proper sentence.

"Medical assistance will arrive in approximately five minutes."

Where the fuck was Dopinder when you needed him? D.P. could have him here in, like, three seconds flat, and then they could be at Claire's in under two if they didn't worry too much about traffic laws, and- oh, Lord, was that…? Peter looked away and failed to resist the urge to puke.

Someone scooped him up from behind, and he almost snapped the person's arm in half in panic before Mr. Stark yelled, "It's me!"

Peter yelled some combination of, "Daredevil's hurt!" and "I'm gonna hurl!" before passing out more suddenly than he expected. Like, sure, he was concussed, but weren't people with concussions supposed to fight to stay awake until they eventually dozed off? Yeah, this was just "D'g'a hrr!" and nothing.

(He learned later that his and Daredevil's eardrums were both ruptured pretty badly. Peter passed out from a combination of pain, blood loss, and falling several feet onto his head.)

When he woke up, Mr. Stark had clearly cried himself to sleep, and the kid's shoulder at least had a stitched-up hole instead of a scorched, hollow hole.

Once again, he rose, tried to walk, and promptly fell over. When Tony woke up, Peter argued that he had to check on everyone, and after a few attempts to name and/or describe "everyone," he was sent back to bed. (He didn't have amnesia; he just couldn't make the words come out, he swore.)

Deadpool showed up the next time Peter woke up, baby-selfed and katana-clad like every time someone failed to find more than 20% of his body. (It was kind of weird.)

"Where's Satan?" Peter blurted before he could force himself to say  _ Daredevil. _ He winced and debated crying.

Deadpool and Tony, on the other hand, found it absolutely hilarious.

(Daredevil was fine, mostly; after he could actually function as a human being, he backflipped out the window in true D.D. style and refused to let anyone else take a proper look at him.)

Peter cried himself to sleep in embarrassment and decided that was enough superheroing for the day.

**Author's Note:**

> [tumblr: nowimaidan](https://nowimaidan.tumblr.com)   
[twitter: nowimaidan](https://twitter.com/nowimaidan)   
[waterfall.social: starks](https://starks.waterfall.social)
> 
> join my discord for wips and more: <https://discord.gg/aUk4nWS>


End file.
